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5 Habits to Develop
We get that everyone is born differently. We aren’t cut from the same cloth or given the same upbringing. But there are things that we need to understand and come to realize as we get older.
It’s not always going to be about how we were raised, how we were born, what comes naturally to us, what doesn’t.
To be the best person you can be, you’ve got to develop the need to learn things as you go along. You need to adapt to your surroundings, to adjust to people, etc.
Here are 5 important habits to develop that they don’t teach in school.
1) Learn to compromise
As you mature, you’ll discover that in your relationships, romantic or not, there needs to be some space for errors, for forgiveness, for improvement.
You can’t get everything you want the way you want it, but sometimes you can get a semblance of it if you learn to compromise.
2) Learn to be considerate
Since we’re different people, we don’t get ticked off or sensitive about the same things. Some people are sensitive to their weight, their height, others with their financial status, their intelligence.
Whatever it is that makes people uncomfortable at the least, learn to be in tune with it, especially with your close friends and family.
Learn to make people feel comfortable around you, to be themselves. It’s important that you earn their trust and make them feel like you’re not going to say something that would hit them below the belt or make them feel small.
If it’s a small matter for you and a big deal for them, the consideration should be on their part. Trust that if you approach it like this, when the situation is reversed, they’ll probably weigh it out the same way.
3) Learn to fight
While it may sound counter-productive, learning how to fight is a necessary skill. Learning to fight isn’t what it sounds like. It’s not about learning martial arts, boxing, or how to get someone convicted of a crime.
Learning to fight means you know what to say, what not to say, and how to say things. In our anger, we sometimes tend to say things we will later regret. We could say hurtful things that we don’t mean, but once done, we can’t take it back.
So at the moment, we need to develop a check and balance system within ourselves to keep up within the line. Crossing it would only make things worse. Learning to fight means you know how to read the person and see what it is they will respond to. Is it shouting? Is it by pointing out concrete examples of different situations?
People respond differently so learn how to fight with people accordingly. See how to get through to them in the most effective manner.
4) Learn to apologize
Along with the skill of fighting, you subsequently need to develop the skill of apologizing. Yes, it’s a skill. Not everyone knows how to apologize correctly.
Though there is no one way of doing it right, there are ways of doing it wrong. Some of these include making the other one feel worse at the end of the fight, sounding sarcastic, and sounding like you’re apologizing just to end the argument. All of which are surefire ways to plant seeds of resentment.
An apology, if done correctly, will make the other feel like their points were validated, that they feel understood and taken into consideration. A good apology has a resolution at the end, and more importantly, a follow-through.
The best kind of apology is one you won’t have to make again.
5) Learn to put things behind
Yes, after all that you go through in life, you need to learn to move on from it. The only way you lose in life is when you allow yourself to be stuck at a certain point in time when you refuse to let go from the hurt and choose to feel that way for longer than you should.
People will hurt us, disappoint us, and abandon us, but there’s no reason why we can’t let time do its job of healing us. The more you resist the natural course of things, the longer it will take to heal.
Realize that nobody is perfect, even you. And in humanity’s imperfection, we will get caught from time to time, but it gets better. We have the resilience of champions!
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