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3 Reasons Why You Have to be Selfish to Be Happy
Why is it that when we do something for ourselves, we’re branded selfish, vain, or egotistical?
Society has given self-care a bad connotation in that we need to do things for others, to help the ones in need, to put our loved ones needs before our own, and other adages like that.
But in reality, we won’t be able to do any of those things if we’re not whole in our selves. So many wise words have been spoken about this topic and a lot of them have begun to contradict one another.
Which leaves us asking, who should really come first in our lives?
Here are 5 reasons why we need to put ourselves first:
#1. Because loving yourself is the gateway to loving others
It’s simple really, you don’t only have to learn how to stand yourself in all your flaws and imperfections, you need to actually love them about you.
Why? Because your relationship with yourself, how you see yourself, will be the method by which you will look at others.
If you can’t stand your own shortcomings, how will you be able to overlook your partner’s own flaws?
You can’t fully know what it takes to love another person because you can’t even bring yourself to love yourself.
#2. It teaches you boundaries
In order to be happy, you need to know what you like and what you don’t like. For example, you like going out, but you don’t like entering the nightclub scenes. Therefore, the kind of friends you keep close to you will also depend on where you’re at in your life.
This teaches you how to prioritize, how to say no to people and things that don’t contribute to your well being, and ultimately this tailor fits your life in a way that makes it clutter-free.
You’ll be able to make room for the people and things that make you happy and that add positivity to your life as opposed to trying to please everybody that you just can’t do. You won’t stand for getting less than you deserve in every aspect of your life.
#3. You learn the value of independence
It’s not that you don’t need other people, because you know you do. But if you love yourself enough, you begin to put a value on your independence and your own identity.
You are an individual first before you are a friend, a daughter, a mother, a partner. Learn to enjoy your own company, have your own thoughts, your own plans, etc.
Even when you’re part of a team, you still have to look out for your best interests. You need to know how to take care of yourself.
Just because you’re part of another unit, a bigger faction of life, doesn’t mean you need to cease to exist. That’s also why it’s important that you establish your value on your own so you know how to integrate everyone else around you and how to position yourself in others.
Whatever it is that’s inside of you will be reflected in your actions and in how you carry yourself.
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Heather