Author of Manifestation Miracle
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How Not to Sabotage Your Relationship
We’re all a little loopy when it comes to love.
No matter how many times we have fallen in and out of love, how many times we’ve had our hearts broken, how many times we’ve said we’ll never let anyone in again and we’ll never let ourselves be vulnerable, we always come back to it.
On some level, it’s no different whether it’s our first or our tenth relationship because it’s different each time we feel it.
That’s why it’s hard to gauge our actions and to control our thoughts where emotions are involved.
We’re all familiar with the concept that the more we fear something, the more power we give it to scare us.
Because of that, the more we think it’s going to blow up on our faces, the more that it’s more likely to end that way. Almost like a self-fulfilling prophecy.
If you want to help your relationship grow stronger, here are the things you need to watch out for.
Your fear of loving
Yes, you may have been hurt before. This isn’t your first rodeo. But life (and love) are not meant to be lived from a distance. You need to immerse yourself fully to experience it in all its glory, even the painful parts of it.
The more you’re scared of the pitfalls of loving someone, the more you’re actually hurting yourself.
Rather than avoid getting hurt, teach yourself how to condition your mind and your heart to endure the inevitable bruises you’re bound to get. Don’t be afraid of feeling, be afraid of being numb.
Comparing the EX to the NEXT
While it can’t be totally avoided to compare it in your mind, especially because humans automatically resort to a previous experience in order to gauge a current one, you should be more mindful of the fact that they are different altogether.
Yes, they can be similar in both good and bad traits, you may experience being in the same situations as before, but all that should be addressed with the present in mind, not the past.
You should remember the lessons you learned and apply them in the situations that repeat themselves. It is not for you to dwell on what happened before.
Different is good
So many people struggle with experiencing new things because they don’t know the outcome. Not knowing can be pretty scary. But you need to remember that new is good. Different is good.
If you keep experiencing the same kind of people, then you’re not growing. You’re just going around in circles.
Don’t be too quick to judge unconventional ways of dating, or a different way of being shown love and affection, or a new method of handling conflict. Be open to all of it.
Stop over analyzing
Not everything has to mean something. Most of the time it’s really just what it is. It’s good that you have the ability to read between lines and take hints from time to time, but that doesn’t mean everyone’s out to cheat you through technicalities.
If your significant other doesn’t text, they may just have forgotten or they’re busy, it shouldn’t mean you’re not important or that they’re busying themselves with someone else.
If they ask you to move in and it feels right, then it probably is. Don’t think about what people will say, that it might look like it’s happening too fast, etc.
You need to learn to let up and let things happen. Stop overthinking everything.
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Enjoy and have a great day.
Kind regards,
Heather